what's love? questions from a 10-year-old

my friend kim took her son, whose about 10, to see the movie A.I. , and he asked her if robots could be programmed to feel love. it got her thinking about love: is it unconditional and should it be? is forgiveness part of love? how much do you forgive; is there a line? is its opposite indifference? these are such great questions! what do you think?

crazy acts of boundless compassion

my friend amy just told me an amazing story. she was walking by the east river last weekend when she spotted a cormorant with fishing line tied around its neck. the bird was in great distress. the next thing you know, amy's tracked down a kayak and paddled out with an old knife to free the bird. what makes this story even more amazing is that amy doesn't know how to swim, and the east river has some of the deadliest and strongest currents around. but she went anyway. people were yelling to her from a bridge, the cormorant got under the kayak, but she prevailed and got the string loose. it's completley crazy and irresponsible...but also so admirable. i wonder, what impetuous, out-of-this-world acts have people done to help someone or something?

lucy

lucy is a black lab/chow mix i adopted from a shelter 12 years ago when i was single in new york and sharing a cramped rental apartment with my airline stewardess roommate. needless to say, she and i (lucy, not the roommate) have been through a lot together. when i got her, i gave her a ross perot chew toy (he was running for office). fast forward: the two of us are now five, if you include husband and two kids. (that's a photo of lucy pre-wedding, which she was in.) we live in in our own home in connecticut. she and i watched obama give his acceptance speech the night he was elected. and, you got it, we're both getting older, a fact i've studiously ignored, until this week. lucy has started to limp and move very slowly, so today, i took her to the vet for x-rays to find out if she's got a fracture or injury of if it's just old-age setting in. needless to say, i'm incredibly sad because i never believed she'd be anything other than a puppy. i'll pick her up after work, and she'll ride next to me on the front seat of the car, like she always loves to do. maybe we'll take a (slow) walk in the dog park in westport, followed by a trip with the kids to get an ice cream. at 12, she's entitled to a little mint chip every now and then, don 't you think?

the tooth fairy! (and other rites of passage)

my oldest son lost his first tooth last night! realize this isn't big news to those of you without kids, or those of you who've been through this with your own, but i am blown away. yes, i knew the tooth was coming out. it's been wiggling and twisting in his mouth like a kid on a church pew for days now. but it seems like just yesterday that his first tooth was growing in. anyway, he carefully left the tooth in a "tooth fairy bag" (photo coming soon) that my mom made for him, with a note: "dear tooth fairy, can i keep my first tooth? love, william" and it worked! good old t.f. left the tooth, a morgan dollar, and a note to keep brushing.

another milestone reminding me how fast life is, how we must cherish every day, and mark special milestones with rites of passage, which seem all-too-few in our culture. (maybe it's time to start a few new ones in our family?) but most of all, william's lost tooth reminded me of how good it feels to believe in the possibility of the tooth fairy. and dreams.

are stores the new museums?

i've long wondered if stores have become our new museums. is fashion just moveable sculpture? then i read michael kimmelman's thoughtful piece, "how we look at art," in yesterday's new york times. "almost nobody, over the course of that hour or two, paused before any object for as long as a full minute," he writes, noting that in the old days, people digested art slowly. really looked at what they were seeing. today, kimmelman writes, we capture art on the fly, in bits and bytes, on cell phones and digital photos, but don't bother to see it properly. but i wonder if we've become more attuned to looking at stores, to design and fashion, which seem to promise an immediate connection to and reflection of our lives (even if it's aspirational). looking at photos of the british museum and the louis vuitton store display, it's hard to tell commerce from art apart. interesting that the baby "remembers" how to devour art (literally!) in a way kimmelman writes about.

dinner rolls

i love nigella lawson, with her cheeky encouragement and simple recipies. last night the boys and i feasted on her soft white dinner rolls, which she says are perfect for kids to bake. both boys were too engrossed in legos to participate, but my babysitter and i had fun making them.

you'll need:

3 1/2 - 4 cups all-purpose flour
3 teaspoons (1 envelope) rapid rise, bread machine or other instant yeast
1/2 tablespoon salt
1 tablespoon superfine sugar
1 1/2 cups milk
1 heaped tablespoon butter

mix, let rise a few hours, then shape into small balls. put on pan abotu 1/4 inch apart. coat with mixture of:

egg
teaspoon of milk
pinch of salt

bake at 425 degrees for 15 minutes.
eat as soon as they're cool enough with butter or jam. or both.

world's uglist birthday cake

who knew you could buy birthday candles shaped like army tanks?

my son wanted an army-themed birthday, so i made what is hands-down the world's ugliest cake (photos coming). it was pure military-industrial complex on a plate, with soldiers hiding from little diorama trees, guns pointing. never mind that i've spent months practicing making lovely fondant cakes in pleasing colors. never mind that i've taught my children that we pray for peace, pet animals, vote democrat, and "feel the love." the gun thing is encoded on little boys' dna. army is what he wanted. so i made the cake. as i mixed up green and brown camouflage icing, i couldn't help wondering about the pet-me-pony cakes a six-year-old girl might ask for on her birthday. or the dessert cart brimming with miniature pastel-colored cakes at the plaza, where my father used to take me for tea as a special treat when i was a child. in any case, happy birthday, william! you are six, and you are my world. i love you.